Within the deep
by The Eternal Scribe
Summary: There were three things she knew for certain: 1) Her brother's partner had an impressive libido that she was happy not to be a victim of, but she really needed a new place. 2) Some deity thought changing her gender was hilarious. 3) Her goal to not become a Uke who wasn't ravished ultimately failed. Self-insert. Slash. Mentions of Transgender character. Parings debatable.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** I've been reading Sekaiichi Hatsukoi again and decided to give this story a try.

 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

 **Warnings:** Yaoi, mentions of a transgender character (I don't mean to insult anyone and I'm sorry if I do by accident), some AU, self-insert OC.

* * *

She woke up underwater.

For a moment she could only stare dazedly at the golden sunlight dancing on the surface above her. Long strands of brown hair rose up around her as she sank further away from the light and deeper into the darkness that she could _feel_ laid in wait. Muddled confusion and slight panic made her heart beat wildly in her chest as she realized where she was. She jerked for a moment to try and swim up-

 _-peace little one, you're safe-_

-was what overwhelmed her and made all her chaotic emotions disappear and mind fall into a half-sleep once again. Her body relaxed as comfort and pure _belonging_ rushed over her, the only sound she heard was the rhythmic beating of her heart singing a soothing lullaby within the soundless depths.

Distantly she could remember dying, the pain and pleading as she tried to talk her way out of death. Why had she been so afraid? Death came to everyone, right? She was only a single person within the great scheme of the world, no better then any other human that walked beside her.

 ** _A little girl with brown hair and excited blue eyes stared up at her with arms raised and gaze pleading._**

 ** _"Up!"_**

Longing shot through her body and she suddenly wanted to grab the small being up into a warm hug and never let go. Family had been the reason why she didn't want to leave, they had been her anchor within the chaos of life and stress of work.

 ** _A man was idly pressing keys of a piano, long fingers nearly floating each note he played. A soft smile played on his lips, making his blue eyes light up with life and caused her heart skip a beat._**

Her husband had been a sweetheart and her best friend when she was in college, though just like any other human being he had his faults, they had been happy.

Loss wasn't a stranger to her, but it was different sort of loss that she felt this time. Instead of losing someone _she_ was the one who took the wrong path and couldn't find her way back.

She wouldn't _ever_ find the path to her family again, it was closed off forever. They would eventually release themselves from their grief and move on with life. Her daughter would grow up to be a strong woman and perhaps even have a family of her own while her husband would watch for the both of them since she wasn't around. She knew without a doubt her husband would be fine, he wasn't one to linger in the past after all and that gave her hope.

If her family was happy she'd be happy.

Idly she wondered if she'd stay conscious the entire time she was...well wherever she was. And if so, how long? The thought of staying underwater for eternity with only her thoughts as company wasn't exactly exciting in her opinion.

 _Sleep child._

That was probably a good idea, sleeping always made things go by faster. Beside she rather liked closing her eyes and allowing her mind to wander and body rest.

 _I have something exciting planned for you little one._

That didn't sound very comforting, she'd rather just stay here forever in the warmth and forget about everything. She lived her life right? She didn't receive any awards or become a legend but neither did she regret any choices she made either. She was content with being a normal human and fading away just like everyone else did.

 _Perhaps, but now it's time for you to go on another adventure, become someone different._

That sounded suspiciously like reincarnation to her, and surely she wasn't special enough to earn such a gift. Heroes were the ones who got to have another chance at life and she most definitely wasn't a hero.

 _Not only heroes little one, many humans are given the chance to try again while others rest for eternity without a worry._

That sounded like a good idea, she'd rather not have all her memories erased. They were who made her _her,_ she wanted to be able to remember her daughter and hum the melodies her husband played on the piano. Though she knew that she wouldn't miss them if her memories were gone, just imagining not having any relocation of them made her heart clench.

 _Do not worry, I will not take those memories from you._

How did that make any sense? Wasn't reincarnation about a fresh start and not having the regrets of your past life hinder you in your future one?

 _For some yes, but for others that isn't the case. Memories are what make humans stronger, allow them to stand up when they're pushed down and face their foe. For this situation those memories are what will help you in your journey._

The more information she was told by the strange voice, the more she just wanted to stay where she was. Having her past memories while living another life sounded complicated. If she was reborn didn't that mean she would be forced into a child's body with an adult mind? She'd be forced to allow someone to baby her when she had spent so long being an adult and making her own choices.

 _Calm little one, everything will fit into place eventually. For now, sleep, you will awaken when the time is right._

Without her permission she could feel her consciousness start to slip out of her grasp and her eyes start to grow heavy. She would do as the voice said and sleep, hopefully forever.

* * *

She woke up in a dark room.

For a moment she stayed where she was, covered in sheets she didn't recognize on a bed she'd never laid on and just stared at the ceiling. Memories of a life she wasn't familiar with ran through her head, a strange asian woman hugging her, a stiff-looking man dressed in a suit telling her to get better grades, a boy with green eyes and brown hair laughing as he ran away from her.

 _My name is Onodera Ren._

It was odd having two memories converge upon each other so suddenly, as if a switch had been flipped and suddenly she could remember everything. The past with a daughter and husband, along with her present, a twin brother to a boy named Ritsu with a strict father who owned a rather well-known business.

She was a male in this life apparently but she couldn't find it in herself to fully accept the change. She wasn't just Onodera Ren, a quiet boy of ten who liked to read, she was also a twenty-five year old woman with a daughter. She was neither but also both people. Would this be called being transgender? Feeling like she was the opposite sex then what outsiders saw her as, she was pretty sure that's what people would label her as. If she actually came out and told people she thought that way of course.

A body shifting beside her caught her attention and she turned her head to look at the small boy beside her. His face was lax with sleep, brown hair falling down to form side bangs framing his face while his hands rested beside his head. He looked so peaceful, like he didn't have a care in the world.

Ritsu right? For some reason that name sounded familiar to her but she couldn't place it.

The love Ren felt for his brother filtered to her as well, as if she really were the twin brother of the boy beside her and hadn't been anything different. In her past life she never had any siblings, but at the moment she couldn't recall what it felt like _not_ to have a brother beside her.

Ritsu stirred under her gaze and she watched his eyes twitch for a moment before they opened and looked at her sleepily.

"Why are you awake so early Nii-san?"

She shrugged. It came from waking up everyday for five years at the same time thanks to her job, eventually she never slept past eight which was heartbreaking for her since she loved sleeping so much. "I just did."

Ritsu yawned and rolled on his back. "It isn't even a school day Nii-san, you should be sleeping."

Now that was the logical thing to do she supposed, but once she got up there was no way she'd be able to fall back asleep. Not when she woke up in a strange room, with memories of two lives running through her head. She sat up and stretched her arms above her head while glancing around their room. It was nicely decorated in shades of green that matched her brother's eyes and had a few pieces of expensive furniture against the walls. From what she remembered her family was well off since their father owned a publishing department.

It was a change from her past life, that was for sure.

"Man it's way too early. " Ritsu grumbled as he got up and ran a hand through his hair.

She rose a brow his direction. "You could just go back to sleep."

He huffed. "Yeah right, you know that I can't fall asleep without you next to me."

Now that he mentioned it she _did_ recall that, being twins meant they had a very close bond especially since their parents weren't exactly the warmest people on earth. As young children they would comfort each other and eventually bonded so close that they shared the same bed despite the fact that Ritsu had his own room. She couldn't find it in herself to be annoyed by the fact and actually found it nice. Being so close to a family member was a something you couldn't replicate even if you tried.

"I suppose we should head down stairs." She spoke and pushed the sheets away from her body. "Do you think mother and father are home?"

Ritsu shrugged. "Maybe mother but I highly doubt father is."

It was a good thing that she and Ren were so alike when it came to personality, he had always been more mature and quiet then his brother which helped her immensely. Even though adapting was her specialty she didn't think she'd be able to pull of being an excitable child who ran around all the time. She wasn't an actress in the least.

She did wonder why out of all the times to wake up she did so now. She supposed it was better then being an adult in a babies body but at the same time she couldn't help but hope that she didn't just take over some kids body.

Eventually they headed out of their room and downstairs, she followed Ritsu as he headed toward the kitchen so as to take in more of her surroundings. Though she could remember where the bathroom was and what photos contained pictures of her and Ritsu, seeing it in person was different. In all honesty all her memories of her current life felt like a dream while her past was more fresh.

A woman with her hair tied up in a bun turned when they entered the kitchen, her brown eyes curious as she stared at them. "You two are up rather early."

Ristu smiled at her cheerfully. "Yep!"

Akiko was more open then their father but she still held the same air about her, one that wouldn't allow them to pull off any nonsense and expected them to act mature despite their age. It came with their father being so important thus making them have to show the world that they were well-raised and lived up to the Onodera name.

She never had to deal with that sort of pressure, in her past life she was just another human being in the world. People easily forgot about her and didn't think bad of her family if she made a bad first impression, but then again her family was normal as well. Her mother had been a happy woman while her father was a mechanic and tended to listen to ACDC rather loudly when he worked on cars. This current life style was already so different then what she was used to she wasn't quite sure how she would be able to handle it.

"Would you like something for breakfast?" Their mother asked making her loose her train of thought.

Ritsu nodded and instantly headed toward a bowl full of what looked like oranges, instantly she felt her mouth start to water and her feet moved instinctually. She _loved_ oranges with a burning passion that probably wasn't very healthy and apparently it passed onto the boy she was reincarnated as.

Akiko smiled slightly and grabbed a couple before handing them each one. "Here, don't make a mess."

Ritsu nodded happily. "Okay!"

She looked down at the orange in her hand and turned it absentmindedly. Though she was hesitant to fully come to terms with her situation it wasn't all too bad. She had Ritsu and a roof over her head, more then some people in the world. Something was still nagging at her though, for some reason her brothers name rung a bell in her head as if she had heard it before in her past life. Perhaps it was a common one? Well she certainly hadn't met any Ritsu's in Japan before so she wasn't too certain about that.

What could it be...?

Ristu Onodera...Onodera...Oda...

Her orange fell out of her hand and onto the floor with a muted 'thud.'

 _Holy_ _crap._

"Nii-san?"

She turned to look at Ritsu and actually _looked_ at him. Brown hair, wide green eyes, father who owns a publishing company...

 _She was in Sekaiichi Hatsukoi._

She tried to recall everything she knew about the Manga, Ritsu was going to meet Takano in High School and fall in love with him immediately, they'd have a small fling before Ritsu would take something Takano did wrong and run off to study abroad. Ten years later they would meet and then...lot and lots of _yaoi._

Ren Onodera was the twin brother Ritsu had never had in the Manga, _she_ was the main character's sibling.

Well wasn't that just great? She had to deal with her brother getting attacked by a man who wanted to get into Ritsu's pants constantly, in fact she was pretty sure she'd need to break Ritsu out of 'I can only sleep with you' habit very soon. Homosexuality was fine in her books but there was no way she'd sleep in the same bed when they were going at it like rabbits.

Maybe she shouldn't move in with Ritsu when he got older since he and Takano had sex _everywhere_ seemingly whenever the mood hit them.

Out of all the Manga and Anime out there she was put in this one, a very peaceful but dangerous universe for those who were Uke's. At least she didn't get put into something like Naruto or Tokyo Ghoul where she'd have to learn to survive or be killed. Still this was dangerous since real life also held it's predators called Seme's, she wasn't certain anyone would try to attack her but she felt for her brother. It must be tough having that much sex with such an enthusiastic partner.

A hand placed on her fore-head broke her out of her thoughts and she blinked up at her mother's concerned face.

"Are you okay Ren?"

She nodded dazedly.

Akiko pursed her lips with concern. "You looked like you were in shock for a moment, did anything happen?"

"No I just remembered something important." She replied honestly. "I'll be okay."

Her mother sighed and stood up. "If you say so."

She watched as the older woman walked back to cleaning the dishes and then looked down at the orange she had dropped. Slowly she crouched down and grabbed it, a million thoughts racing through her head as she examined the fruit in her hand.

She'd have to be very careful not to change anything, everything happened for a reason and she wasn't about to play God on the characters. Maybe from time to time she'd try to help Ritsu figure out some things but otherwise she'd just keep to herself. There really wasn't anything for her to do here anyways, no one to save or try to find, this world was peaceful compared to some Manga she had read.

"Are you sure you're okay Nii-san?"

She got up and turned toward her brother, forcing a small smile on her face. "Of course, just thinking."

Ritsu eyed her for a moment before seemingly accepting her answer. "Wanna go outside?"

"Sure."

Though she had no idea why she was placed here she'd make the best of it and try to live life to the fullest, there were so many things she could do here. The first thing she'd aim for was joining a swimming team, since that was her second favorite thing, and then she'd try to figure out if she wanted to follow Ritsu into publishing. It would be a good chance to be around the characters but also not make it her life goal to meet them, she loved reading and writing so publishing was something she'd be good at.

For now she'd relax and enjoy her freedom, she didn't need to worry about bills or going to work right now she could be a child again.

* * *

 **AN:** So this idea just came into my head as I was writing this chapter and I couldn't help myself. Sorry for any mistakes and I hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Any thought of who Ren should be paired with?


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:** Thank you for the reviews!

 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

 **Warnings:** Look to the first chapter.

* * *

The years before she reached the start of the story flew by. Between trying to get used to her body and gender, while forcing herself to act like a relatively normal child she was constantly on edge.

In her past life she never had a problem knowing who she was, she was a mother, a wife of a loving husband and that's all there was to it. Now though, now she was completely different.

Ren was a male, twin to a character in a yaoi manga and stuck in a young body while having the mind of an adult. Most of the time she yearned to get away from the overwhelming presence of two parents she never felt a connection to, she _wanted_ to be independent, have a job and make her own rules.

It took about a year, but eventually she got used to it and just accepted her situation. It wasn't all too bad, Ritsu's presence was soothing and they got along despite the fact she wasn't actually his brother. He was more of a bookworm then she was, that was obvious after she witnessed him go through three books within a weeks time. He ate them up like she did oranges showing that he too was more mentally intelligent but not on the level that people noticed.

Five years passed and went and before she knew it she was nearly a completely different person.

* * *

 _Age eleven_

Shopping for clothes was the first huge problem she came upon in regards to accepting her gender. They went to some random, but obviously high-end, clothing store full of cute dresses, nice skirts and gorgeous shoes that she had to pass in favor of looking in the boys section.

It didn't feel right to her, the pants were too baggy and the shirts usually had some cartoon character aimed toward the male population. She didn't say anything though, with her mother being so stern and the fact that she didn't want to say anything she forced herself to try and find _something_ she liked.

"How about this one?"

She shook her head and Akiko put the shirt back on the rack with a thoughtful expression. "You aren't usually this hard to find clothes for Ren, is something the matter?"

"I'm just not into this sort of style anymore." She replied, glancing over the clothes surrounding her. "Is there something more...punk?"

Her mother furrowed her brows. "Punk?"

"You know like ripped jeans, sarcastic shirts and spiky jewelry?"

The older woman didn't seem to like the thought of her son wearing such clothing. Ren wasn't too surprised, Akiko and her husband were formal people who liked wearing black and white clothing. Heck even Ritsu was rather into that more 'grown-up' style then she was, but she honestly just wanted something a _little_ bit feminine. To her places like Hot-topic and such weren't really focused on one gender, a male or female could walk in the store and buy the same exact clothing without thinking it didn't fit to their gender.

Akiko pursed her lips. "Why on earth would you want to wear that sort of clothing?"

"I just thought it was interesting." She murmured not liking the disapproving look she was earning. "I'm not into the type of clothing you and father are."

From the looks of it Ren was going to have to deal with the white shirts and black pants until she grew old enough to get a job. Which she could survive, just because she preferred a certain style didn't mean she wasn't going to be open to other ideas.

She looked at the white button-up shirt her mother had placed down and stared at it, she was good at adapting. "Never-mind, I think this clothing is fine."

The older woman didn't seem to believe her in the least but grabbed up a few shirts of the same style and some other things without another word. Apparently pretending to like the style was enough for Akiko to just forget what she said and act like it never happened.

"Are you okay Nii-san?"

Ren looked back at her brother who was looking at her in concern and nodded her head. "Yeah, everything's fine."

Ritsu huffed and grabbed her hand before following their mother deeper into the store. "Liar."

She looked down at their intwined hands and allowed a small smile to form on her face, Ritsu always comforted her without having to know why she was upset. It was like he had an instinct ingrained in him just for her, in some ways it made her feel special. Besides her husband Ritsu was the only one who knew her well enough to tell things like that and that made her miss her past life a little less. With Ritsu around she was sure to survive until she got old enough to go out on her own.

...

..

.

When it came to her father their relationship was nearly nonexistent. Most of the time he was gone and when he was home he usually locked himself in his office for the whole day. If she find happen to see him for more then a few moments she could easily tell despite being busy their father was much more accepting of her and Ritsu's own decisions. Like the both of them he had green eyes but that was where the similarities ended, with his dark hair and just aura of 'don't mess with me' many people ended up becoming intimidated by his mere presence.

"You're mother was telling me you've been acting odd lately Ren."

She sighed from her spot standing in front of his desk, of course Akiko told her husband about how she was acting odd. Though she and the past Ren were similar, they weren't the same person so there was bound to be confusion for the next few months. "I've just been thinking lately, that's all."

Noboru, her father, hummed thoughtfully as he continued to stare at her. "Any particular reason why? From what Akiko told me you've become more distant and have gained interest in a very different style then you usually wear."

How could she explain this to him without sounding insane? She couldn't very well tell him she wasn't his son and was in fact a grown woman stuck in a child's body. "I just started to mature I suppose."

The older man nodded and intertwined his fingers, for a moment he gazed at her without allowing any emotion to pass across his face. She refused to allow herself to squirm under his gaze, for some reason she felt like he was analyzing her and if she showed any weakness he'd title her as weak.

"I'll talk to Akiko tonight, just don't go too crazy with the satanic symbols and leather."

She held back a retort knowing better then to look a gift horse in the mouth, not all people that were into that sort of look wore stuff like that but Noboru didn't know that. For whatever reason he was allowing her to do as she wanted and that removed a heavy weight off of her shoulders. Maybe her situation was as bad as she first thought.

* * *

 _Age twelve_

As usual school was her worst enemy, though the children were a lot more well-behaved then when she was back in High School it was still _school._ Many times the teachers would mix her and Ritsu up since they were identical and the girls would coo about how cute they were together. Though she didn't care it drove Ritsu mad, unlike the cannon he almost seemed more confident then she had seen him be as a child. It was probably to do with the fact that he had a brother instead of being mostly secluded from the rest of the students because he had his nose in a book all the time.

Of course Ristu still read, but not as often as one would expect him to. She expected he'd get more interested once he met Takano which would activate his stalking, that always amused her when she read the Manga. Their love had been so adorable.

Despite the students saying they wished to have an identical twin as well, she and Ritsu didn't socialize with anyone very much. Mostly because the teachers were aware of who Noboru was which made them act more formal which in turn made the students keep their distance. Ritsu wasn't too bothered though, in fact he seemed perfectly content with ignoring them in favor of doing work or talking to her.

Sometimes that worried her since children needed to make friends, sure she and Ritsu were twins but that didn't mean they were the same person. As much as she adored him she wished he'd try and branch out before completely dismissing everyone.

Ren wasn't in control of what he did though, so she could only observe and make sure she wasn't unintentionally forcing him to hang out with only her.

Out of the two of them she had the higher grades, which only came from her not wanting to seem like and idiot but at the same time trying to level down her intelligence. Being seen as a genius wasn't something she intended to achieve, people would set higher standards and she'd have to be constantly worrying about meeting them or risk disappointing a lot of people. So on the tests she purposely got things wrong but made it so she answered just enough questions to be seen as smart. There was only so much she could hold back after all.

Ritsu was smart in his own way, the only problem he had was with math which set his average slightly lower than hers. But that was easily changed once she started to help him with his homework and explain the problem in a way he'd understand better. They had a lot of expectations due to the fact that their father was so important so she made sure to keep Ritsu happy, at his age he didn't need to be weighed down by something as extreme as that quite yet.

Because of this, she and Ritsu became even closer and in turn he became surprisingly protective.

But she never knew how much until a boy decided to pick on the geek of the class when everyone had already left to head home.

"You know being all smart and all I think you should help out your classmates." A boy with gelled hair spoke as he leaned against her desk.

She rose a brow. "Is that so?"

He smiled. "Yeah, it isn't fair that you keep on getting good grades while the some of us are hardly passing."

Ren was tempted to say he should try to study instead of goofing off but decided against it. "I wouldn't be a very good teacher."

"I think you're lying," He shook his finger mockingly in her face. "A friend of mine was telling me how your brothers grades in math suddenly rocketed about a month ago, I wonder who could have helped him."

She held back a sigh, was this so necessary? Just because she was smart people saw her as a 'geek' and instantly saw her as the weak link. "Look just ask someone else, I don't have time for your childishness." Now she was getting annoyed by this whole situation and that made her placid personality to turn harsh.

The boy 'tched and suddenly she was grabbed by her collar and forced to stand so their faces were nearly touching. "Here's how it's going to go, you're going to do my homework for the rest of the year and I'll hold back from beating you to a pulp, okay?"

She gazed at his malicious face coldly. "No."

His face darkened dangerously and she could almost hear a 'snap' go off. His arm cocked back and his hand formed into a fist but her gaze didn't waver from staring him directly in the eyes. She had been a few fights before, she wasn't afraid to take a hit.

The boy hesitated when she didn't so much as move, confusion crossing his features.

Before either of them could say anything a fist slammed into the side of the boy's face making his grip slip from her uniform as he staggered back with a yelp of pain.

Ren turned to look at her savior, eyes widening slightly when she saw Ritsu with a severely pissed off expression on his face. "If you so much as touch my brother again _I'll kill you_."

The boy stared at her brother with a hand covering his cheek and took a few steps back, she spotted tears gathering in his eyes for a moment before he was racing out of the room and down the hallway. She wasn't too surprised since the boy was only twelve after all, he probably didn't expect to be the one who was hit.

"Are you okay?" Ritsu asked, eyes blazing with anger as he took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

Ren nodded, watching the small boy in wonder. She had no idea that her brother had that in him, sure Ritsu had always been hot tempered but she never imagined him going as far as to hit someone. Though she didn't condone violence, having someone do something so courageous so they could protect her made a soft smile form on her face. Slowly she walked forward and embraced the other boy, snuggling her face into his neck as his arms wrapped around her as well.

"Thanks Ritsu."

Neither of them said a word to their parents about that day and whenever she happened to pass by the boy he always made sure to avoid her eyes, it was safe to say no one dared to try and bully either of them again.

* * *

 _Age thirteen_

His third year of being a boy was when Ren finally started to accept who he was. The constant conflict he was having with his inner-self and the fact that he had changed genders was wearing on him mentally and he knew it would lead to something bad if he continued to fight it. The fact was though, he didn't fully transform into a different person, he was still the mother who missed her family, but at the same time he was Ren.

It was honestly a little confusing, but eventually Ren accepted the changes and saw them as good. This was a new chance at life, he was given another try with his memories of everyone he loved from his past life and that was more then what he could ask for. Being able to remember his daughter and husband was something he cherished but never lingered on, eventually he was going to have to move on with his own life no matter how painful it was.

He didn't get rid of who he had been completely though, in fact little things such as joining the art and swimming club was one of the things _she_ had wanted to do when she got old enough. It was something to keep his mind off the mind-numbing boredom of school and a way to exercise without getting too smelly.

Many people saw him as feminine since the girl inside of him still lingered, and that was fine. After being what he had been through Ren wasn't one care _what_ people thought when in regards to how he acted. He was Ren with a twist and that was all there was to it.

His mother still thought his style was atrocious even if he didn't go full out and people still called him a geek, but otherwise everything was okay.

That was until he started puberty.

Then all Hell broke lose.

Having been a girl in his past life Ren knew about what males went through during puberty, but only to a small extent. Most of his knowledge was obviously focused on girls and what they went through, so it was easy for him to be shocked when he woke up to sore bones and well... _that._ All of his talk about accepting who he was turned meaningless when it came to the lower part of his body, still he had a hard time looking at it not to mention touching it. So to see it so eager was well, shocking.

He could only stare at blanket, or one place in particular, in confusion and panic. _What was he supposed to do?!_ Beside him Ritsu stirred making his blood turn cold, images of his brothers reactions ran through his mind was enough of a motivation for him to scramble off the bed and topple onto the floor.

His brother yelped in shock and sat upright, eyes wide and alert as his gaze darted around the room. "What's happening?! Are you okay Ren?!"

Ren nodded from his place on the floor and stayed perfectly still. "Just dandy."

Ritsu groaned and he heard a soft 'thump' signifying that the other boy had laid back down. "Why are you on the floor?"

"It's comfortable."

An awkward silence.

Ren shifted uncomfortably on the floor but stilled when the movement sent a warm sensation down his spine. How in the world was _that_ so sensitive?! What in the world was he going to do until it calmed down, just pretend he really was comfortable and wait it out or something?

"I'm going to go to the bathroom." He announced, making sure to keep his back facing his brother. "I need to use the toilet."

Ritsu snorted. "Isn't that what people usually go to the bathroom for?"

Yeah but he didn't want his brother thinking he was doing something suspicious in there or anything, that'd be so embarrassing if Ritsu knew _what_ he was going to try and accomplish.

Forcing himself to not walk like a duck Ren quickly made his way out of the room and headed toward the bathroom, hands nearly shaking as he fumbled with the door nob. He sighed when the door opened and quickly closed and locked it with a loud 'bang'. Hesitantly he looked down and eyed _it,_ cheeks flushing hotly as he finally saw how happy it looked.

Okay so this couldn't be so hard, right? This was his body, he could do this.

...Maybe.

After that embarrassing freak-out he only experienced a few more of those moments but nothing too intense which made him relax, his bones ached from growing nearly two inches within a year but it wasn't anything too bad so he was able to deal. He held back from talking to either of his parents about it since he didn't trust them enough to converse about something so personal, but he was sure his mother suspected something. Akiko was stern, but a good mother who took care of her children and knew when they were going through some major changes.

Ren wasn't able to tell if Ritsu had went through anything yet, since his brother never said anything about it, but he expected that Ritsu was more of a late bloomer then he was and had yet to experienced anything. Which was good and bad, bad since Ren had no one to talk to about it but good since he could help the other boy out when he went through those certain changes.

Not like that, but like try to explain things and such.

Ah God he was so doomed.

* * *

 _Age fifteen_

Ren's second stage of puberty started sometime after his fourteenth birthday, which resulted in him shooting up to a shocking 5' 11'' far taller then he had been in his past life. Thankfully he seemed to settle for a little while which allowed his bones to finally relax, but with that came more _moments_ and frequent bathroom visits. It also seemed that Ritsu started his puberty as well since he grew a good couple inches within the time they turned fifteen and more then once Ren spotted him racing toward the bathroom and couldn't help but snicker.

He was proud to say though, he had master _it._

Unfortunately though the changes started again and gained in speed near to his fifteenth birthday. His body started to show how his constant swimming was affecting his overall physique started to slim down. It was startling, that much was for sure, but he was actually very interested in what was happening. Ren took to constantly visiting the library and reading about the changes of Puberty and how long it would last since he wanted to get to know his body better. It was actually very interesting to him since his body was going to be changing so much that he couldn't help but be in awe. His voice was going to change, he'd probably grow a few inches taller, and he'd actually be able to grow a _beard._

Though there were moments he'd freak out, Ren was slowly getting used to dealing with his body. In some ways it was easier then a females, he didn't have to deal with crying over ridiculous things every month, but in the same case he had to deal with _it_ constantly.

Like, it just wouldn't _calm down_.

Besides that though Ren had a peaceful life. He and Ritsu started up High School in the spring, it was a surprisingly large building with a rather impressive library that Ren took advantage of to read up on Puberty. It was free so why not?

Then well...he bumped into someone.

Ren grunted as he took a few steps back and rubbed his nose while looking up at the taller male. "Sorry I wasn't looking where I was going."

"It's fine."

He blinked a few times and then narrowed his eyes, taking in the dark hair covering the strange males face and over all looks. The boy was very tall and obviously older then him so he assumed that he was at least two years older.

The boy just passed by him without saying another word, and Ren watched him, trying to remember where in the world he had seen him from. Maybe he was in one of his classes?

"Ren did you find what you were looking for?"

He turned toward Ritsu who had a book in his hand and nodded and raised his own book. "Yeah."

Ritsu smiled and motioned toward librarian. "Then let's go, you have swimming in thirty minutes right?"

"Right."

Ren shot one last glance over his shoulder, eyebrow raising when he saw the same boy looking their direction. Though he couldn't see the strangers eyes he could feel that the student was looking at him. He wasn't too surprised since people looked at them often, for some reason everyone loved staring at them and trying to see the differences between them, but he didn't think the other male was looking for that reason.

 _Just who was he?_

* * *

 **AN:** A lot of people where saying they wanted Ren paired with Mino, and I actually had no idea who you were talking about until I looked him up lol. I'll definitely think about it. Anyways I hope you liked the chapter and I apologize for any mistakes.


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